another moral hangover. fuck.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
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