I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Congratulations! We have a period
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
