Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
