i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Randomize
