i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
