SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
