office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
