I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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