Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Randomize