I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
