Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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