yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize