their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
She announced her abortion via fbk
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Randomize
