If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
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