Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
i drank out of a bidet.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
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