All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
