i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
