Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
