i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
