There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize