On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
