don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize