he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize