Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
