ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
