I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
