I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
