I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
