guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
