i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
