Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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