She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
