it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
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