Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
