he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
