I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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