he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
