I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
