I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Randomize
