Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize