I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize