This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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