What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Randomize