i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize