is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
