this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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