Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
