Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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