Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Randomize