isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
