My hair reeks of homosexuality.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
