So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
home. puking in laundry basket.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Randomize
